The Stone of Arbitration
by Joe Fenton
Summary: Various Ranma characters use the arbitration stone to see what it's like to be Ranma.


A Ranma 1/2 one-shot. Ranma and Akane decide to switch identities for the day. Who got the better end of the deal? Did either learn anything? A mild R rating for language and adult situations.

This story and a few others can be found on my web page at  
http://www.geocities.com/jlfenton65/  
jlfenton65@yahoo.com  
  
Ranma 1/2 is a trademark of Viz Communications, Inc. and was created by Rumiko Takahashi.  
This story is of my own derivation and is not intended for commercial purposes, so please don't sue me.

Author's Notes: I've read a variety of one-hour challenges. Not having regular correspondence with many fanfic authors, I've never been challenged to one, but I like the idea. So, I challenged myself. Here's the result.

Ready...

Set...

_GO_!

Situation Normal, All Fucked Up

by Joe Fenton

Ranma and Akane walked along the sidewalk towards school. Actually, only Akane walked along the sidewalk; Ranma walked on the top of the fence bordering the canal beside the sidewalk. This irritated Akane to no end, which was probably half the reason Ranma did it. This led to inevitable arguments, today being no different.

Akane glared at her fiance. "Why can't you walk down here beside me like a normal person?"

He didn't bother thinking about his reply, which was probably the other half of the reason he walked on top of the fence - it kept him a little more out of range of Akane's temper. "Why would I wanna walk next ta a tomboy like you? People might get the wrong idea."

She fumed. "You mean, they might actually think we're _engaged_?"

He nodded. "Exactly." Then noticed her posture and expression. "Er, what I mean..."

For once, Akane didn't try to flatten him. "I think you act that way because you don't understand what you put me through. You have no idea of how your actions hurt me."

Ranma almost fell off the fence in surprise. "Hurt _you_? I'm the one that gets malleted, slapped, kicked..."

Akane interrupted him. "A little physical pain... you're conditioned to take that kind of punishment. I'm talking about emotional pain; the kind that makes you hurt for days and affects those around you." She gave him a hurt look. "You more than anyone should understand what I'm talking about. Which hurts worse, talking a hit from your father, or listening to him call you a girl?"

Ranma looked away in embarrassment. "I - you know I don't mean it when I call you those things. I just don't know how ta express how I feel." He looked her right in the eye. "A lot of the time, you start it. You don't listen when I try ta explain myself, or call me a pervert. You don't understand anythin' of what I gotta deal with."

This was what Akane was waiting for. She took a deep breath to steady herself. "And you have no idea what I have to go through." She pulled a stone from one of the pockets in the her school uniform jumper. "I think it might help our relationship if we switched places for a day."

Ranma looked at her in surprise. "Ya mean, you be me, and I be you?"

She nodded. "Yes." She held up the stone. "I got this at a magic shop yesterday after our big fight. It's supposed to allow two people to switch places."

Now Ranma looked suspicious. "A magic shop? A _real_ one?"

"Yes. You know, the kind that you suddenly happen on that wasn't there yesterday? Has some creepy old man or woman as the clerk? Has just what you're looking for at a price you just happen to be able to afford at the spur of the moment? Then disappears the moment you leave?"

Ranma dropped the suspicious look and nodded. "Sure, I'm familiar with that. So, what exactly does that do? I don't feel like being stuck as you for the rest of my life." He puffed up a little. "That might be great for _you_, being me and all, but you're not exactly what I wanna be -"

She took a step closer a raised a fist. "This is _exactly_ what I'm talking about!" She took another breath, trying to get back control. "I checked before I bought this; it was used by some ancient people to resolve differences between two parties. Since conflicts can have many different levels, the magic was designed to allow for a wide range of limits and conditions on how the switch is made." She got a disgusted look on her face. "_Really_, Ranma. You think I want _you_ to actually have _my_ body and memories?" She gagged. "There's no way I want you poking around in my mind." She continued the thought to herself, 'Since you'd realize immediately how much I love you.'

"Agreed. You probably couldn't handle my memories, anyway." He couldn't help but think, 'As often as you say you hate me, I certainly don't want you knowing how much I love you.' He scratched the back of his head. "How about we just look like each other?"

Akane shook her head. "Not enough. People would pick up right away that we weren't the same as usual."

Ranma thought a moment and nodded. "Not to mention what would happen if ya got inna fight with Ryoga. He doesn't hold back in our fights; you could wind up seriously injured."

Akane snorted. "Why do you two always fight anyway?" She waved him off. "Never mind. Okay, how about a switch involving form and abilities?"

"Better, but if ya really want ta be me, ya gotta have my problems, too. The whole idea is for you ta see what I have ta go through."

"What _you_ go through?" Akane sputtered a moment. "Fine! Form, ability, and fortune. Sound fair?"

"Agreed. Okay, how do we do this?"

Akane held the stone in both hands and bowed her head. Her form and clothes shifted to that of Ranma, while Ranma shifted to that of Akane.

"AAAHHHHHH!" Almost immediately, Ranma started to tilt as she stood on the fence top. She pin-wheeled her arms in a desperate attempt to keep from falling over, then fell to the sidewalk on her rear. She stood up rubbing her bruised backside. "Geez, Akane. Isn't it about time you learned to do that?"

Akane had been distracted by the yell and watched herself fall from the fence. "If you're going to be me for the day, you shouldn't be doing that." He got a thought, then jumped onto the fence and smirked down at the girl. "But I should be!"

Ranma fumed as she watched himself walking back and forth on the fence. Akane started doing a few backflips, engrossed in his new abilities. "Okay, okay! Enough! We gotta get ta school."

Akane nodded, but then noticed something. His face screwed up and he started flapping his hands at the wrist. "Ewwww! Grosssss.... aaaahhhhh!" He leaped straight out over the canal. The water sprayed into the air as he hit the surface. A red-haired girl surfaced and made her way to the side closest the fence. "God! How can you stand that?! I'm going to have nightmares!"

Ranma put her hands on her hips. "Ha, ha. _Very_ funny, Akane. Come on, let's gets some hot water so you can change back before class."

The red-head flipped gracefully over the fence, landing next to Ranma. She shook her head, sending water flipping from her pig-tail. "Not a chance. That was the most disgusting thing I ever felt. I'm a _girl_! I'm not going around as some pervert boy."

Ranma smirked at her. "I thought the whole idea was to see how my life was?"

Akane glared at her. "No, it was for _you_ to see what _I_ had to put up with!"

Ranma rolled her eyes. "Whatever. Hey, how long is this gonna last?"

Akane slipped the stone back in a pocket. She silently thanked any deity listening that she hadn't dropped it in the canal. "All I have to do is hold the stone and think about returning things to normal. I'll do that later this evening." She started towards school. "Come on! We're going to be late if we don't hurry."

All at once, her danger sense went off. She had never felt it so clearly as now. She jumped back against the fence in a ready stance facing the way her sense indicated as where the danger would appear. An oval platform descended; on it were several figures in robes and masks bearing pole arms.

One of them stepped off the platform as it reached the ground. "We have come for the girl." He indicated Ranma with the pole arm. "Do not interfere or we will be forced to kill you." Two others moved to either side of Ranma. She glanced between the two and moved into a defensive stance.

"No way you clowns are takin' me!" She leapt at the one on her right. The figure side-stepped and grabbed her arm as she went by. The other stepped forward and took her other arm. Ranma started kicking her legs as she was hoisted into the air. "Let _go_, ya jerks! Who the hell are ya? What the hell do ya think you're doin'?!"

The first intoned in a flat voice. "We are the Priests of Aratukano. You have been selected."

Ranma glanced back at Akane. "Uh, _Ranma_! That's your cue!"

Akane smiled widely. "Have fun! See you later." She watched as they hauled Ranma back to the platform, which rose, and moved slowly away.

Ranma's voice slowly died as it moved farther off. "Akane! You stupid, uncute, macho, tooommmboyyy -"

Akane kept smiling. This was going to fun! She never got to be the hero before. She started to move toward the building closest the direction in which the platform had headed off. Roof-hopping sounded so appealing. As she tensed to leap, her danger sense went off again. She leaped to the side as a bicycle narrowly missed running over her. As it passed, she reached out and grabbed the frame, halting its forward motion. Its passenger was not as quick to stop.

"Nihao, husband! What you aaaaahhhhhhh!" Shampoo went flying and bounced a couple times before finally coming to a stop against the building. She staggered to her feet and gave Akane an angry glare. "Why husband do that to his Shampoo?!"

Akane smirked at the Amazon girl. She knew just how to treat the little tart. "I'm not your husband. Just leave me alone from now on, you brainless bimbo."

Red flames sprang up around Shampoo. "Brainless? Bimbo? Shampoo have no choice but punish husband!" She pulled out her bonbori and leapt at Akane.

Akane's smirked widened into a smile as she easily avoided Shampoo's strikes. She let the girl wear herself down as she dodged. "You're right, Shampoo; you have to be pretty to be a bimbo. You're just easy." She taunted. She always _knew_ Ranma should have been able to avoid Shampoo's hugs; she'd give him a piece of her mind after she rescued him.

Shampoo gave a strangled yell and increased the power of her swings. Akane danced around the Amazon, making her look like an amateur.

'Wow!' Akane thought. 'I never realized just how good Ranma was!' She gave the other girl a cocky grin. "Okay, enough playing." With that, she took the offensive. She knocked the bonbori from Shampoo's hands, took her legs out from under her with a sweep, then sent the girl flying with a low upper-cut. She pulled the punch so that Shampoo merely flew off back towards the Cat-Cafe. She boggled at how easily she had taken down the girl. "Holy _shit_!" She stared a moment longer, then picked up her book-bag and resumed walking to school, lost in wonder.

She was still lost in thought as she approached the school. Her danger sense started up again, but wasn't necessary as the danger announced itself.

"Pig-tailed girl! How I have longed for your delightful appearance. Come! Let us embrace and share our mutual lov - urk!" Kuno folded over Akane's fist, which was currently planted in his gut. She stepped back to let him recover and cracked her knuckles. Oh yeah... time for a _real_ work-out.

Kuno wheezed a moment, then straightened. "I see my love has decided to test my manly resolve once more. Fear not, goddess of my life! I will prove myself worthy, for am I not Tatewaki Kuno, the Blue Thunder of Furinkan High?" He held his bokken aloft as thunder pealed in the background. The few students left in the school yard looked around, checking the weather.

Kuno lunged at the pig-tailed girl. She dodged the bokken, noticing how much quicker his strokes were compared to Shampoo. She grinned. Still not quick enough for the Great Akane Tendo. She felt little need to hold back as much as she had against Shampoo. Kuno had this coming.

As she entered the building, she hardly noticed as Sasuke, the Kuno family ninja, dragged Tatewaki off for treatment. She was far too happy with things to be concerned with such trivial concerns.

The day passed uneventfully until the final period. She entered the girls locker-room to change for P.E.as usual, only to be chased from the room with feminine screams, shoes, books, and various other handy items. 'Oh yeah! Ranma doesn't change there.' She had to think for a moment before remembering how Ranma dealt with changing into his/her phys-ed uniform. She went back to Ranma's locker, removed a girl's uniform, then slipped into an empty store-room, being sure to lock it behind her. The one problem Ranma had that she understood better after today was that of all the perverts in the school. Ranma wasn't allowed in the girl's changing room or bathrooms as Ranma was really a guy, and he didn't _dare_ use the boy's changing room or bathrooms. She finished dressing and went out onto the field to join her class.

She was smiling widely as she enjoyed an invigorating game of soccer. She really appreciated Ranma's extra strength and speed as she blasted another ball _through_ the goalie. She failed to notice the growing ire her antics were producing; it was just so exhilarating making steals, even from her own teammates, dodging down field around and over the other players, then blasting a goal.

She was still smiling as she walked home after school. Wow! It was great being Ranma. She _knew_ the idiot had the better time of it. He was always bitching and whining about something, when all this time he had it so good... much better than she did. She grew even happier as her danger sense went off - time for more fun!

She jumped sideways as something tore through the spot she had been occupying and buried itself in the concrete sidewalk. She lost her smile as she noticed it was an umbrella. She faced Ryoga, wondering why he would attack her.

"Hey, Ryoga. What's up?"

The boy before her didn't bother with small talk. He launched himself forward in a strike that would have taken Akane's head off if she hadn't moved. "DIE, Saotome!!!"

She could see the murderous intent in Ryoga's flushed face. That punch had been _much_ harder to dodge than anything either Shampoo or Kuno had thrown. It would have also killed her if it had landed. She didn't understand... what had Ranma done that Ryoga was mad about now? They hadn't seen the Lost Boy in over two weeks. She tried to calm him down. "Please stop, Ryoga. What's got you so upset? Maybe I can help."

Ryoga swung the umbrella again, taking out the brick wall behind Akane as she jumped over the stroke. She twisted in mid-air to avoid his follow-up kick.

"You can help by _dying_! Because of you, I've seen _hell_! Now, I'm going to send you there!" He followed up his kick with another punch-kick-stroke combination, then stabbed at the ground in front of Akane.

She shut her eyes as she instinctively leapt backwards, tucking her head to her knees and doing several rotations as the ground exploded. She landed on her feet and prepared for his next attack.

"Stop this! There's no reason for us to fight!" She was worried she'd really have to hurt him to get him to stop.

Ryoga's battle-aura popped on, a bright, sickly green. "NO REASON?!! NO REASON!!! DAMN YOU, RANMA!!!" Light started building around his hands as Akane's eyes widened. "SHI SHI HOKODAN!!!!"

Akane was thrown across the street and through a wall as the ki-blast caught her. She staggered up out of rubble and wiped the blood from the corner of her mouth. That hurt! She knew she had to do something; she couldn't take too many of those.

"Talk to me, Ryoga. What's so bad that you want me dead? I haven't even seen you for a couple of weeks. I never thought you dishonorable enough to attack a girl; at least let me change back." She tried stalling for time, hoping Ryoga would calm enough to talk. She felt only slightly bad about trying to point out the gender discrepancy; while she felt a girl could be every bit as good as a boy, she knew just how tough Ryoga was.

Ryoga just laughed. "At least you're human! I have to worry about being eaten! Do you know how many people see a little pig and think 'dinner time'?" He started gathering his ki for another blast.

Akane just stood stunned. Pieces started falling into place - Ranma sneaking into her room with a kettle of hot water... Ryoga never being around at the same time as P-Chan... his intense fear of water, every bit as bad as Ranma's... the bandana Ryoga and P-Chan both wore... Ranma constantly calling Ryoga a pig. She stuttered. "A - a - a pig? A little _black_ pig? With a bandana?"

Ryoga, believing her to be taunting him about his curse, howled and fired another blast. This one struck dead-on and smoke billowed up, obscuring his view. He raised a fist. "At last! I have my revenge on that - that - that -" He trailed off as the smoke cleared. Akane stood there unscathed in a blue battle-aura that glowed so bright, Ryoga was forced to look away.

Akane drew on Ranma's abilities and held her hands out, palms forward.

"MOKO" A globe of ki started to form in front of her hands.

"TAKA-" The globe swelled to the size of a beach ball. Ryoga suddenly realized the danger and started to edge away, then broke and ran.

"BISHA!!!!!" The globe chased the fleeing boy, catching him before he got half a block from the fight. The explosion consumed everything all the way back to where Akane stood, flinging Ryoga off into the distance. Akane stood awhile longer with her arms held out, shaking in rage. She slowly came out of it as she heard her name being called. She blinked and noticed Ukyo shaking her.

"Come on - snap out of it Ranma!"

Akane smiled hesitantly at the chef. "I'm fine Ukyo. You don't have to shake me."

Ukyo gave her a funny look. "You sure, Sugar? You sure ain't acting normal." She gestured to the scene of the fight. "I've never seen you go that hard on Ryoga, not that the swine doesn't have it coming."

Akane boggled. "You knew he was P-Chan?"

Ukyo laughed. "Of course, Ran-chan. The only who doesn't is that violent fiancee of yours." She smirked a bit. "You think she'll _ever_ figure it out?"

Akane's eyes glazed over and she started shaking in rage. 'I will not ki-blast Ukyo - I will not ki-blast Ukyo -' She chanted to herself as she tried to regain her temper.

Ukyo looked at her in concern. "Are you _sure_ you're okay? You're looking out of it again, Ran-chan."

Akane gave a forced laugh. "Heh. Yeah, I'm fine. Um, I'm just, uh, trying to remember why I haven't told her yet."

Ukyo patted her on the shoulder. "Look, I know you gave Ryoga your word not to tell and he's taking advantage of your honor, but if she can't figure it out with all the hints you keep dropping, she's got no one to blame but herself." She gave a cheerful smile. "Come on, Ran-chan. Let me make you a few dozen okonomiyaki."

Akane smiled at the girl with more feeling. "Thanks, Uk - Uc-chan, but I should be headed back home. They're probably wondering where I am."

"Sure thing Ranma-honey. A rain-check it is." She started to walk off.

Akane felt a stab of guilt. She really liked Ukyo; if it wasn't for the fact that they were both after the same boy, they'd probably be best friends. "Uc-chan?" The girl stopped and looked back. "I - I'm sorry about stringing you along for so long. Friends shouldn't treat each other that way."

This time, it was Ukyo whose eyes glazed over and started shaking in rage. "S - s - stringing me along?"

Akane never saw the danger; she was now using another of Ranma's best abilities - the 'foot-in-mouth' ability. "Yeah. It isn't fair to you or anyone else. I'm really sorry about that."

A battle spatula sent Akane flying. "DIE, RANMA!!"

It was evening by the time Akane awoke. "Oohhhh... what hit me?" She tried to remember what happened - she was successful. "What in the hell did I say to Ukyo?" She shook her head, then groaned. She'd try to make it up to the girl later. Right now, she just wanted to get home.

As she dragged herself into the house, she noticed everyone around the table and walked over. The others just eyed her as she flopped down. She noticed the looks. "What?"

Nabiki gave her the evil-eye. "Ranma, where's Akane?"

Soun gave him a similar look. "Yes, son. Where is my little girl?"

Akane's eyes got really wide and a look of comprehension flooded her face. 'Oh yeah - I _knew_ I forgot something.' She laughed nervously and scratched the back of her head. "Uh - she kinda got, um, kidnapped this morning."

There was a collective face-fault. Soun was the first to recover. His demon-head projection towered over Akane. "RANMA!!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!! YOU GO GET MY LITTLE AKANE RIGHT THIS SECOND!!!!!"

Nabiki was looking at Akane in a way that would have sent shivers up the spine of a demon. "Ranma? Why didn't you go after them _this morning_, when it happened?"

Akane was sweating hard. "Uh... I forgot?"

"YOU FORGOT?!!!" It was only so loud because it was repeated by everyone present at the same time.

Akane tried to think, a bad choice seeing as she had Ranma's abilities right now. "Well, first I fell in the canal, then there was Shampoo, then Kuno showed, then there was class... heh, heh..." She stopped. She was only digging herself in deeper.

Nabiki was definitely going to kill her. "Do you even remember who took her?!"

"Um..."

There was another collective face-fault.

A few hours later found them in Nabiki's room in front of her computer. She had a search engine in the browser and was trying matches for the information she was getting from Akane - such as it was. Nabiki tried not to get too upset; she could do that once her sister was rescued. She rubbed her eyes.

"Okay... so they were priests of some sort." Akane nodded. "They wore robes and masks." Another nod. "And you think the name was something like 'artichoke'?" A little more questioning tone on the last.

"I don't remember! I'm trying!"

Nabiki mumbled, "Very trying." She looked at the hits she was getting. "Artichomout?" A shake of the head. "Artafilise?" "Arechkeow?" "Arouteaphiny?" "Aratukano?"

Akane jumped up in excitement. "YES!!! That's the one!"

Nabiki leaned her head back and mouthed 'thank-you' to the ceiling. She clicked on the link to pull up their web-page. 'Huh,' she thought. 'Cults got home pages now.'

Akane leaned over her shoulder and put her finger up to the screen. "That's them! They're the ones the took R - er, Akane!"

Nabiki found the link for ceremonies and clicked on it. She skimmed the page until she came on some relevant information. "Well, I got good news, and bad news"

Kasumi spoke up for the first time. "Oh, most definitely, the good news first." She smiled at Nabiki, who shook her head and sighed.

"The good news is - we don't need to worry about them doing anything - er, like _that_ - to Akane."

Kasumi smiled. Akane held her breath; she hadn't even considered what might have happened to Ranma.

"The bad news is - they won't do anything like that because they need a virgin for the sacrifice."

Kasumi quit smiling.

Akane blew out her breath, then looked at everyone straight. "Well, now that we know who took her, let's go!" Everyone gave a funny look. "What?"

Nabiki spoke for the group. "Ranma? That's _your_ job, remember?"

Akane gave an exasperated sigh. "Well, where am I supposed to go, and when do I need to be there?"

Nabiki consulted the web page. "Hmm... says here, the ceremony is performed on the first new moon past the summer solstice." She pulled up her copy of 'Starry Night' and had it find the next full moon based on the cult's location, then converted back to local time. "You have to be there by 1:23 am tomorrow morning."

Akane looked over at the clock. It read 11:53 pm. "Um - do I have enough time to get there?"

Nabiki glared at her. "If you borrowed a jet from Kuno, it would still take you at least four hours to fly there!" She grabbed Akane by the collar. "Ranma!!! They're going to kill my little sister in less than two hours!! If you don't _think_ of something, come 1:24 am, I'm going to _fucking kill you_!!!!"

Akane tried to divert Nabiki's attention. She looked at Kasumi. "I don't think you need to put it quite like that..."

Kasumi interrupted her. "Oh no, Ranma. This is definitely the time for such language."

Akane swore to herself. 'Damn you, Ranma! You always manage to mess up my life, even when you're me!' She stomped around the room. 'Errrrrrrr - Ranma should be able to get _himself_ out of this mess! Why should I have to go and stick my neck out for an idiot pervert like him...' A look of shock adorned her face. The others noticed.

"What? You thought of something, didn't you? Tell me, God damn you!!!" Nabiki was still frantic.

Akane pulled the stone from her pocket. "Um, I got this the other day. It'll, um, send me to where anyone I think of is, and send them back here." She was sweating; she hoped they bought that.

Kasumi asked sweetly. "But if you had that all along, why didn't you just use it? We wouldn't have even had to figure out who these people were."

Akane had the grace to look embarrassed. "I forgot?" Nabiki slapped her hand over her face.

Akane held the stone in both hands and closed her eyes. She willed things back to normal. She felt her form change slightly and drew a deep breath. 'Now to see if those Drama Classes have paid off...'

Akane opened her eyes. She was back in her original form, wearing her school uniform as she was before she made the switch this morning. She tried for a look of complete surprise, then burst into tears and jumped for Kasumi. "Kasumi! Nabiki! I can't believe I'm back!" She sobbed into Kasumi's shoulder for awhile. "I - it - it was _horrible_! There were these awful men, and they took me somewhere, and they said they were going to kill me..." she trailed off into just crying.

Kasumi held her youngest sister and just made soothing noises. Nabiki and the others looked almost ready to pass out from the tension and their relief over her safe return.

Akane looked around. "W - w - where's Ranma?" She tried for angry and crying at the same time. "That - that - _idiot_ did _nothing_ as they dragged me off!" She shook in rage. "When I get a hold of him..." She went back to crying.

Nabiki now looked angry as well. "He used some kind of magic stone to switch places with you. Don't worry, when he gets back, we'll make sure he wished he _never_ got back." She smiled evilly.

Kasumi looked thoughtful as she held Akane. "Akane? Is Ranma a virgin?"

Akane looked like you could have knocked her over with a feather. "_What_!!! How the hell should I know!!!!" She blushed a bit, then in a calmer voice continued. "Well, um, I _think_ so. Why?"

"Well, Ranma was in girl-form when she switched places with you, and those priests still need a virgin for their sacrifice."

Akane's jaw dropped. She looked over at the clock, every eye following her gaze. 12:07 am.

Three days later, Akane was sitting on the porch looking over the koi pond. She was really worried about Ranma. She'd had three days to think about that day and worry. She tried to tell herself, this was Ranma they were talking about; then she'd realize, this was Ranma they were talking about. She put her head down against her knees and thought about crying.

The door to the house opened. Akane looked back through the sliding doors into the living room and watched as Ranma dragged herself toward the bathroom. She was wearing a gold bikini with white, silk veils hanging in shreds from her arms, her pig-tail, and the bikini bottom. Some of the veils also appeared to be singed. She closed her eyes and said a prayer of thanks.

Nabiki also noticed Ranma enter. She moved to the phone in the kitchen.

When Ranma came out of the bathroom an hour later, he was once more male and in his normal Chinese outfit. He never said a word as he followed the covered walkway towards the dojo. Nabiki stopped him before he could enter. She put up a hand.

"Just a moment, Saotome. Some friends would like to welcome you back." She smiled as the back gate opened.

"Ranma! I'll kill you for making my life hell!"

"Foul sorcerer! You're evil scheme to enslave the beauteous Akane and the lovely pig-tailed girl ends now!"

"I think we need to talk about 'strings', Sugar."

"Shampoo punish husband!"

"We need to get a few things straight, son-in-law."

"Saotome! For how you treated my darling Shampoo, I will kill you!"

Nabiki smirked. "There's also about fifty girls here who need to talk to you about the changing room and a soccer match."

A roar from behind the first group sounded. "YEAH!!!!"

Akane jumped forward. "Wait!" She came up in front of Ranma. "I got first dibs." She pushed him into the dojo. The door slammed shut and a loud thud sounded as one of the walls shuddered.

Ranma looked at Akane as she held him against the wall of the dojo. She smiled evilly, flung her body against his, put her arms around his neck, and pulled him into a passionate kiss. She was trying to put as much passion into it as she could. After a minute, she broke the kiss; they both gasped for air. Akane leaned her head against his chest.

"After you're done playing with your friends, let's find someplace private and make sure we don't have to worry about virgin sacrifices anymore."

Ranma's pig-tail stood straight out, his eyes as wide as saucers.

Akane gave him another evil look. "Remind me to take care of your girl-side too. Can't leave things half done after all." She gave him another kiss, them grabbed his collar. "Let me give you a head-start on the others."

Just as everyone was wondering what was happening, a loud roar came from the dojo. "Ranma! You _JERK_!!!" Ranma came flying through a window and over the boundary wall.

Ryoga pointed at him. "There he goes! After him!!!" He then ran over Mousse following the flying form of his nemesis. Everyone else followed right on his heels.

Akane leaned against the dojo wall for a moment with a blissful look, then put on a scowl and stomped out the door. She needed to get back to her room and find something suitable for tonight.

_The End_

Click... damn, over two hours. Oh well, at least I had fun writing it. 


End file.
